Goodness I am so appreciative of the wealth of wisdom and generosity of sharing on this forum. Thank you everyone.
On chair and luxury topic, everyone is going to have a different perspective on whether it's worth taking a luxury item (or items) or not, for the weight. By way of context and background to my own decision, I've spent some years "punishing myself" in various ways, dealing with grief of my father's death, pushing myself to do a Masters degree at a top UK university while working full-time to support it. Looking after a newborn baby, and shortly diagnosed with cancer and undergoing surgery without proper post-surgery pain relief as I was nursing her and wasn't allowed to have painkillers in my bloodstream. Running myself ragged while writing a book, and there was something in the pain. My father was a marathon runner, before he pulled a hamstring and later died of cancer. There's something in my biology as best I can explain it, to take physical pain while going through emotional pain, and punishing myself somehow for it.
In any case, I am now having a year of going the other way, of spoiling myself. Of being kind on myself. Nurturing of myself.
Now obviously in hiking, one pays for one's luxuries with the weight and discomfort of carrying them.
If someone is thru-hiking, and their entire day is taken up with hiking more or less from dawn to dusk, to "make miles" as it were, I think the lighter the pack - the better. You're basically pitching your tent, eating a quick meal, and crashing shortly after from exhaustion, and the darkness and its effect on circadian rhythm.
But if one is hiking say 4 hours a day, then there's a lot of time potentially spent in camp. There's more time for stopping during the day, for taking a long lunch in a pleasant spot, or getting to the end of the day and relaxing back. And then I think it's worthwhile considering taking a Helinox Zero chair at roughly 500 grams. There's a video on that view also here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPCvXaFRN_kIt's a case of "hike your own hike" though. The ultralighters will not agree to take a chair. The traditionalists won't think it terrible to take one. For me, it's worth it. I see it as being kind to myself, nurturing of myself, a luxury I think worthwhile to take.
Interestingly, in an historical article I read about a Victorian's man advice on camping, he cited the #1 most enjoyed luxuries by himself and his men while camping. And you guessed it, up the top of that list was a portable chair. Actually I shall dig out that original article as post it as it might be amusing to some of you to read.
@Amahb I know of that Hyperlight Mountain Gear pack from dyneema, and it looks great! Good on you, hiking with 3 kids - fabulous.
I've already ordered the Sierra Designs Flex Capacitor pack, while has got good load-carrying capacity, so I'll let you know how I go with that.
I think the Osprey Lumina looks great but needs a bit more delicate treatment, from what I've read.
With my 2.5 year old, I think the Sierra Designs Flex Capacitor will be good, and will be big enough for the type of trips we do. I used to have a WE Wildchild also for her, but she won't sit happily in the carrier anymore, and she's also got so heavy to carry plus adding gear to the child carrier as well. When she's old enough I'll introduce her to carrying a small amount of weight in a mini backpack. (Like I'm talking 0.5 kg, and then 1 kg etc, as she grows older, before anyone chastises me.) I tend to take more car-camping / base camping at the current age. We did a lovely trip to Fitzroy Island near Cannes, and small hikes out from base camp. We have a lovely Sierra Designs Flash 3 tent for base camping which is 3 kg, and a lighter version Sierra Designs Flash 2 FL which is 1.8 kg and very comfortable.
I'm going to wait for the new pack to arrive, before listing my existing Berghaus packs for sale. (If it does indeed fit perfect, and do the job of my 2 packs.)
Best,
Emma